The All Fisherman Are Liars, Well I am A Liar & A Cheater

The kids and I have been fishing the Neshaminy Creek across the street from our home and it has been surprisingly difficult to catch anything with the kids falling in and throwing stones into the water. I decided to step things up a notch and take them to the Big Brown Trout Hatchery & Fishing Lake in Effort, Pennsylvania. They have a lake that is stocked to the brim with trout, it is totally cheating, it would be more difficult to catch a fish in an aquarium. When the kids and I arrived, we started out using night crawlers (aka big worms, what a great name by the way, “night crawlers”), we casted the big worm into the lake and let it sit there for about 30 minutes. I imagined the worm sinking down past hundreds of trout and then it was resting anxiously on the bottom of the trout infested lake watching mammoth trout fight over who gets to eat it, and of course, my imagination has the biggest trout ever pushing the smaller trout aside and sinking his lips into the bait and I reel it in and show all the other cheating fisherman my conquest. What actually happened was that nothing bit my bait and despite me seeing hundreds of trout swimming past me and jumping out of the water all around me, nothing bit. Jaclyn and the kids were getting restless and even I began to question my competency, I marched into the store at the lake and decided to make a bold move, I bought Berkley’s Trout Pellets, the same things these poor trout have had to eat for the previous 2 to 3 years of their lives. The moment I casted out the new and improved bait, dozens of trout swarmed the pellets and we immediately hooked up. Winston and Dalia took turns reeling in the fish and everybody had a blast. It costs $2.50 to enter and then you have to keep all fish you catch. I think they charge you about $6 per pound for the fish you catch. It was worth it as the family had a great time, Jaclyn even caught one by herself. Dalia was fearless and grabbed a big slimy rainbow trout up with both hands and put it into our bucket, I hope she stays like that and never becomes too girly.

For all of you who are interested, please know my presentation went very well today. It is a relief to be done with it.

One last thing, I walked by a woman and man talking in the hotel last night and here’s what I heard the woman say to the man:
“Not only is the kid retarded, but he’s standing there in his underwear.”

That statement keeps rattling around in my brain, I am trying to understand how that fit into the conversation.

One thought on “The All Fisherman Are Liars, Well I am A Liar & A Cheater

  1. I’m so happy your presentation went well, you must have been distracted by all those retarded people in the audience in just their underwear.

    Like

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