Belle


Dalia was scooping up her bath water with her hand and drinking it, I caught the act from the corner of my eye and said, “Don’t drink that, you’ll get sick as a…dog.” I realized that this statement probably did not make much sense to her since she’s not acquainted with many sick dogs, the best I could do was talk about my father-in-law’s dog Belle. “You don’t want to end up like that sick, grumpy, old dog Belle, you better stop drinking that water.”

My work has moved to Frazer, PA, I have now made the commute for about a week and still have no idea where it is, I drive there and show up, but I have no point of reference. Every day I drive down the turnpike, get off onto 202 south and then get off on exit for 401, once off that exit, my building magically appears, I don’t see any other buildings, towns or anything, it just appears.

We went furniture shopping a couple weeks ago. Dalia needed a new bed and we desperately needed a new kitchen table (the old one wobbled like crazy any time you used a knife to cut something). I asked that Jaclyn handle the selections and discussions with the furniture people because I just don’t like talking to people. We went to two places and both times the sales people left Jaclyn to talk with me, I guess they assumed that I was the ultimate decider. That really annoys me because I really didn’t want to be involved and I truly had no idea what Jac was in the market for. I guess all the other women out there are completely incompetent and ruined it for Jaclyn.

I have started a war against telemarketers, we are on the do not call list and they still call us anyways. My favorite type of unsolicited call is when you pick up the phone and wait for 5 seconds and then someone comes on and says, “Don’t hang up!” The other day someone called and I quickly interrupted them to say, “Please take me off your call list.” They said, “Wait a second, who is this?” I responded, “It doesn’t matter who the $^@%! I am, just take this $(*&#+@ing number off your list.” Jaclyn looked up from her dinner and I could tell she was thinking “Oh boy, he’s had a bad day.”

Winston is now into Pokemon and imagines there’s Pokemons all over the backyard, he chases the imaginary creatures with his net, catches them, and puts them in the cooler. Dalia is now into catching frogs, well, I think she just catches the same frog over and over in the backyard, they call him Jumpy.

Last week I was in San Francisco and I think it was the 5th time I’ve been there, after the meeting concluded I had about 5 hours before my flight and I went to a restaurant that I really enjoy. It is cool being fairly familiar with all the major cities across the country, I can tell you about 50 great things to do in San Francisco, but I don’t even know if there’s a gas station in Frazer, PA.

I took the family to a Trenton Thunder game, $11 a ticket and we saw a great game, several varieties of entertainment between innings, and fireworks at the end, I think I am starting to like the minor leagues more than the majors. The Phillies sell out crowds are just too much to deal with, I should start going to 76ers games, they have about 57 people at their games.

Going to Palm Beach this week, I might just pack the swim trunks.




Illness

My goodness, our household is plagued with illness. For the past week, our sleep has been interrupted multiple times per night by the sounds of kids vomiting, crying, screams for water, and my favorite, requests to sleep in mom & dad’s bed. Now Jaclyn has the bug and I’m hoping that this is the final bout with illness until the winter.

Winston’s seen several doctors about his coughing, snoring, and vomiting and they’ve concluded that his tonsils have to go. In late July he’ll be heading into surgery and getting them removed. We asked the doctor about the recovery process and he said it would take about 2 weeks and it wouldn’t be pretty, it would be a rough period for all involved. Winston understands that this will help him and he’s very aware of his coughing, obstruction of breathing, and sleep apnea impacts his life, so he’s actually excited for the procedure as the means for remedy. He’s a smart kid, when the doctor explained that his tonsils were too big and were causing him problems, Winston asked, “How will we shrink them?”, the doctor said he’s going to take them out, Winston asked how is he going to take them out? The doctor didn’t really want to deal with this conversation and didn’t skirt around the issue, he said he’s going to cut them out. Winston seemed satisfied with the answer and has been pleaded with us to have the surgery sooner than late July.. This has to be one of the hardest decisions we’ve made as parents so far, there’s risk with the procedure and the procedure will result in an awful amount of pain for our son. But his sleeping is terrible, he often sounds like Darth Vadar when breathing, and when he runs hard it frequently results in vomiting, our hope is that this 2 week payment of pain will result in 95+ years of a healthier life for him.

I’ve noticed women wearing bigger and flashier watches lately, what’s up with that? I really think it is a warning sign for men, more men are stay at home dads, females are now more likely to graduate college, and more women are putting off children to rise higher in the workplace. I wonder what the inverse reaction for men would be, if women are wearing big flashy gold watches, I think the inverse thing for a man to do to acknowledge their new role would be to start wearing Mom jeans high up above their belly button. I say in ten years, there will be a rising popularity for male strip clubs for women and more men attending tupperware parties (anyone interested in starting one with me?).


Who’s Putting The Cat In The Bag?

I love common expressions because they are things you say, everyone
agrees with what you said, but no one ever takes a second to think how
creepy the saying is. Cats have the craziest expressions about them,
they must have been going through some terrible times about 100 years
ago when these expressions were all gathering favor. A cat always
lands on his feet…maybe, but it is odd that this hypothesis was
tested enough for it to become a common saying. Who let the cat out of
the bag? Here’s a better question, who put the poor animal in the bag
in the first place. Perhaps people put them in a bag and swung them
violently into a big rock ten times because we all know 8 whacks
wouldn’t kill a creature with 9 lives. Why would you want to kill a
cat by putting it in a bag and bashing it into a rock ten times? That
answer is easy, to skin it of course! There are many ways to skin a
cat. They say curiosity killed the cat, but they never said who’s
curiosity, perhaps it was the person who was curious to see if it would
land on its feet, maybe the curiosity of a man wanting to find new ways
to skin a cat, or it could of been the man who simply put the cat into
the bag, but why in the world do you put a cat in a bag?


Concerts

Dalia is now big into performing concerts for anyone willing to watch. She’ll most likely grab a spoon or spatula and come into the room saying “Ladies & Gentlemen, get ready for the concert!” The usually belts out the songs with her total lung capacity and her dance involves bending her knees repeatedly to make her pop up and down.

Our lawn definitely has the award for least grass coverage in our neighborhood. This weekend I raked up a bunch of the rock hard soil and put down grass seed, by the way, who knew grass seed was so expensive? Anyways, I poured all kinds of grass seed all over the yard on Sunday and woke up in a nervous panic on Monday as a heavy storm was rolling through, I pictured the seeds floating down to the Neshaminy Creek. Upon returning from work, I inspected the area and I think about 50% of the seeds are still there, but it showered again today, so maybe we’ll have about 25% left. Freaking grass. I also need to buy dirt at some point as I have various dips and holes in my yard…buying dirt, welcome to adulthood.

I am taking my first vacation day of 2012 on Friday, it will be the big Cuatro Del Mayo celebration!

The Deem family hit up Shad Fest last Saturday, Aunt Kate tagged along too. I think everyone had a real good time taking in all the people and stuff, we saw a woman walking a rooster on a leash, which just screams Lambertville.

Jaclyn gave me her birthday wish list, it is 11 things I didn’t know existed.