No Teeth

Dalia has had an “American Girl” doll that she received from a family friend. She loves the doll, she dresses it up and wears a matching outfit to sleep at night, they are good friends.

The other day, Dalia was spending time with a good friend and they started to discuss their respective “American Girl” dolls when her friend made a bold proclamation, “Your American Girl doll is a FAKE, she has no teeth.”

I cannot be sure how the conversation went after this statement, I am relying exclusively on Dalia’s recounting of the experience to understand all the facts, but I can tell you that it really upset her. Dalia brought this conversation to our attention last night and I said that not having teeth is preposterous, I cannot imagine that every American Girl doll would have teeth and besides, how critical is it that your doll has teeth anyways, it doesn’t eat anything.

Anyways, I decided to get to the bottom of this myth and went to Google. The Google informed me that nearly all American Girl dolls do in fact have teeth (there is some rare American Girl doll representative of a Polynesian Island culture where it is indecent to display your teeth, so there is one doll without teeth, but Dalia’s doll is white with blond hair and clearly not that doll.

I yanked the doll’s pants down and looked for a tag, it is the Target brand doll that looks identical to the American Girl brand. I walk back into the room where Dalia & Jaclyn were laying on the bed, waiting for the news. I felt like a doctor about to inform the family that the patient I’d been caring for has died under my care. I look at Dalia and just hit her with it, “Your doll is not an American Girl doll.” Jaclyn immediately says, “WHY DID YOU SAY THAT!” Dalia starts to cry.

Jaclyn is frustrated by the absurdity of the situation. Dalia obviously loved the doll before knowing it was not an American Girl doll, it seems insane to not love it so much now that the tag is slightly different. However, I can imagine some sense of embarrassment if Dalia was repeatedly claiming that her doll was an American Girl doll and then she was informed that she had been wrong the entire time.

I do something even more absurd, I try to make Dalia see the situation through the eyes of the doll, imagine how sad the Target doll is to find out her mother (Dalia) no longer loves her, or loves her less than before & calls her a fake!

One reason Jac is so amazing is that she can 100% block out all of this “keeping up with the Jones”, she does not care about labels, or money, she really loves what is most important. That makes Jac very unusual in a wonderful way.

It was a very emotional night, but provoked a lot of great discussion. Dalia’s birthday is coming up, a doll with teeth may be in the cards.

6 thoughts on “No Teeth

  1. I’m thinking it’s time for the no teeth fake Target American Doll rescue organization to be born. Dalia Deem C.E.O. Jaclyn Deem C.F.O.
    Robert your scaring me with the verbalizing of pulling the pants down thing on the poor toothless unloved doll. There goes her self esteem. Maybe it could be the American doll west Virginia version.

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  2. I know how traumatic this is for Dalia, but your retelling of this story really made me laugh. Yes, I’d say a doll with teeth is a must for her birthday.

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  3. Can I just how disappointing the newest incarnation of American girls dolls are. They used to really out emphasis on the history of the dolls and had booms to go along. Now they are more about the accessories and being girly. They still have the booms but it is way played down.

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  4. My 7 year old daughter, Bebe, loves American Girl Dolls and even had her birthday this year at the American Girl Doll store in NYC. I just read this post to Bebe and my wife. I think the lesson in your post was great for them to hear!

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